Monday, April 19, 2004

I just came off the phone with one of the doctors working on this coma device..... this is a system which includes an EEG machine...maybe modified. But they test someone wired to this device. They stimulate them in a variety of ways and senses and monitor the EEGs. Then they study these and maybe they can determine that someone is "thinking" and is "self aware".

Bearing in mind the Bell-Curve theory of the universe: That everything, every thought, pulse, experience.... can be plotted along a Bell Curve and so most fall on the top or near it.... and the rest drop off either side in a curve, like sand or bodies piling up at the foot of a cliff.... Some people can be at the top of the Bell Curve with full awareness. I presume that means like the Dali Lama or Fred, the janitor. Both at the top of the curve. Then there's the rest of us....remember that this is in maybe 11 dimensions, too... are less and less "at the top". By definition for every ONE at the top, there have to be an infinite number of "Not the tops", which explains why so much of the universe acts like it is pissed at something, and merely lashing out at you somehow. We forget that by definition of an "Infinite Something" there will also be just a TON of great stuff, if we choose to perceive it.We don't have to DO a damn thing, something is always GOOD happening to us. If we can get up in the morning, great, but save a cheer for being able to THINK of getting up. Literally. What if that concept was contained in a part of your brain which took the brunt of the hit when your van got hit?

So maybe Jon will first say, "What are these things hanging down from me?" and I will have to explain "legs" to him. Or me and his doctors. Times like this my back hurts... of course.

The information they may get from working with Jon may someday greatly help some other son or daughter to walk again, to speak again...Something more than just BE there. Which is, if you think about it, exactly how God must feel. Being infinite He can't go anywhere that he isn't already there. Being All-Knowing He can't play hide and seek with His Son, because He is All-Freaking Knowing. Well, goody for those who think that's great, but all it is, is All-Knowing. No Surprises. That would make anyONE go nuts from time to time. I think that explains the Balkans and the Mideast. And maybe Vegas.

If you were a doctor and felt you had mapped out pretty much everything modern technology could tell you about a person.... that is the kind of thing you can notice with machines.... and tell if they are noticing you. What if they notice and just don't care? This thing called TBI can certainly, I think, argue for a Near Death Experience. Big time. It just doesn't STOP, does it? Your brain is spending 99% of it's energy trying to plug holes. And once in awhile someone has the chance to look in and notice the guy pluggin' holes. It strikes me that for the guy pluggin' holes we might forgive him if he doesn't stand up and cheer, but HE'S PLUGGIN' HOLES!

So I wonder if that is what it might be like for Jon.

Maybe when he sighs and puffs out his cheeks and stares ahead... Maybe he's seeing himself being 60 or so, still in a wheelchair, still not able to move a limb and not really caring. You have to ask if maybe there is not a good reason to consider the idea that we need to be watchful and considerate and be ready to do what any person of good will would do. NObody will hurt my son. I had these tests once on my back, my leg, really. I guess they were working on the theory my numbness and pain came from damaged nerves. So this guy ran current thru my leg and measured how it went. It hurt like hell and I told him so. I told him several times and sat up and made him stop once. It hurt like hell. If I had to lay there and "take it like a man" because I couldn't make my eye blink the way I wanted it to... well, that will never do.

But these very nice people measure "little" currents. They don't impose their own. They want to know how Jon feels about things like pictures and touch and movement and light. And then we may be able to teach the kid to think about something easy to create in his mind and we measure a purposeful response. Ain't life grand? It all comes to being perceptive enough to see when someone is talking to us. Even if it is a "little talk" so hard to hear, or understand. Who is disabled, if WE have to have machines to "hear"?

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